Daughters on Three Continents

It occurred to me the other day that we have daughters on three continents.  For parents who are self-confessed control freaks, we are a bit out of our comfort zone.  And yet, that is exactly where the Lord wants us to be.

Savannah Faith waits for us in China.  As usual the most frustrating part about adoption is the fact that we have absolutely NO control over the time frame.  Our part of the paperwork is finished and ready to be put in the mail.  We're just waiting, waiting, waiting on the government - this time the U.S. government - to complete their next step, so we can mail our dossier to China.

Adoption paperwork is a bit like watching an orchestrated dance. First  paperwork waltz's across the ocean to China where you wait on PA (tentative approval to adopt your child) and then back to the US for I-800A (tentative approval to allow the child to immigrant).  The waltz continues with the dossier going to China for LOA (definite approval to adopt your child) and then back to the US for I-800 (final approval to allow the child to immigrant).  Then the dance continues as the paperwork makes the trek to China one more time for TA (approval to travel to China) and then back to the States for the US Embassy's approval for an Embassy date.  And finally the dance winds down as plane tickets are obtained.

Now think about your most recent DMV visit.  Do you remember the bureaucratic speed (ahem) and clarity that awaited you upon your arrival? (Do you notice the sarcasm in my voice?  There is a reason we call my most dreaded experiences "DMV moments" in our house.)  Now imagine DMV speed and multiple it times the six trips across the ocean our adoption paperwork must make to the various government offices, both in the States and in China, before we can finally get approval to travel.

Now you understand the glazed stare that meets your eyes when you innocently ask us, "When is Savannah coming home?"  Sigh....

That brings me back to my original blog paragraph, we are completely out of control, and that is exactly where the Lord wants us.

While we wait and wait to hear paperwork updates on Savannah, Michaela is busy at work in Swaziland, Africa.  It's a bit surreal making weekly calls, via Skype, to a continent half way around the world, to our seventeen year old daughter and realizing that we have absolutely no ability to go to her if anything is wrong.

However, I can honestly say, we have a complete peace!  It can only be the Lord.

It's thrilling to hear the joy in her voice as she tells of sharing Christ's love with the children at the carepoints.  The fact that she is in her element is indisputable.

Even her training on our farm has even come in handy.  Two days a week she harvests fresh vegetables.  After spending all morning in the fields, the team takes veggies to the carepoints where they are distributed to the children.  The vitamins and nutrition from these are invaluable for the children whose primary diet consists of one meal a day of corn and beans! 

And while two of our girls are out of our reach but safely in the Lord's hands, I'm reminded that our four daughters who are right under our roof are not really safe because of "us."  They, too, are safe because of His good pleasure and His protective care.

One of my favorite verses has long been,

"If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,

 

even there Your hand will guide me, Your right hand will hold me fast."  Ps. 139:9,10

 



It has extra special meaning to me now as I wait for two daughters to come home from "the far side of the sea."

Jesus with "skin on" & Daisy (aka - Lainey) is Fully Funded

Recently I was just having a few hard weeks.  You know weeks when you feel all alone.  Our budget was extra tight.  Left-over medical bills and adoption loans.  No one seemed to understand.  Okay, maybe I was just having a bit of a pity-party, but I was in need of seeing Jesus with "some skin-on".  You know what I mean??

Then I got a most unexpected phone call.  A sweet friend, that I haven't talked with in several years other than a random FB post or e-mail, called and and asked if she could bless us by buying our girls some dresses for the spring/summer season.  Ahem...I was speechless.  Humbled.  Amazed. 

Elizabeth you were truly Jesus, to me, "with skin-on".  Thanks for being obedient to His Spirit and for giving sacrificially to bless our family!!

I LOVE the dresses!!

And on another note...a special thanks to all of you who donated to Daisy's (aka - Lainey's) heart cath fund.  She is fully funded and should be having her heart cath in China in the next week or two.  Please pray for God's hand of protection on Lainey and for His guiding hand for the Dr.'s as they perform this delicate procedure.

Here is a photo of sweet Lainey from last year.  Despite the low quality of the photo, you can see how blue she is.  Keep praying for an adoptive family to step forward for this sweet little 5 year old girl.  She's been waiting for over a year for a family to call her own!

More Adoption Thoughts....

Thanks for all the encouraging comments on my last post!  They meant so much to us. We've received 6 of the 8 background checks for my mom (a huge praise God!!) and are still waiting on fingerprint dates. 


We received news that we will not be receiving a matching grant from Lifesong, that we had applied for a few months ago,  for our adoption expenses.  The economy has hit all non-profits and the grant agencies are no exception.  At first I was disappointed  and trying to figure how the Lord was going to provide the $12,000 balance that remains for Lily's adoption...

(This is a photo Phil took last May when he was on a mission's trip in Peru...it helps me visualize crossing the Jordan...see below)

....but as I was praying about this aspect of the adoption, the Lord showed me this passage in Joshua, where the Lord commands the Israelites to cross the Jordan to finally enter the Promised Land...

"So when the people broke camp to cross the Jordan, the priests carrying the Ark of the Covenant went ahead of  them.  Now the Jordan is at flood stage all during the harvest.  Yet as soon as the priests who carried the ark reached the Jordan and their feet touched the water's edge, the water from upstream stopped flowing.  It piled up in a heap a great distance away....while all Israel passed by until the whole nation had completed the crossing on dry ground." 

Joshua 3:14, 15, 16a, 17b

I was reminded that not only did the Lord part the Jordan so the Israelites could cross on dry ground (as if that wasn't amazing enough!), but just to show His might and power...He did it during flood time! 

This adoption is "flood time" for our finances.  This is our 4th international adoption (3rd in 4 years), and we have already had 3 open-heart surgeries in the last 3 years and have 2 more coming up this year or next. 

We have no resources to "tap into" this time.  He will have to provide, and yet He is the Lord that parted the Jordan...and not just when it was at it's regular level...but just to remind us of His power...He parted it at FLOOD LEVEL!  

I love that I serve a God that is into the details...that comforts me in His word by reminding me who He is and who I am!   Yahoo!!  He's not worried that LifeSong didn't have a matching grant! He's not worried that our timeline is slowed down by a request for more paperwork.  He's the God that takes care of His people during Flood Time!

I'm doing a happy dance today!!  For when Miss Lily Rose will be in our arms!  And not for the seen...but for the unseen!  For the battle that is being wage in the heavenly realms on our behalf!  We know who wins this victory!

"Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; His greatness no one can fathom."  Psalm 145: 3

Another Seizure and More Lessons from the Lord

In the continuing medical saga of our family, I've had another set-back.  After a number of seizure-free months, last week during one of Phil's and my weekly date nights, I had a seizure.  We were sitting in a theatre enjoying a movie when I had a brief aura...just enough time to tell Phil what was about to happen...followed by a grand mal seizure.  By the time the movie was over, I was oriented enough to walk out to the car.  Needless to say our date night was cut short!

I hesitant to be so transparent on our blog, but I feel compelled to dispel the myths surrounding those with seizures.  For too long tradition has held that seizures cause IQ issues (no funny comments here:), mental health issues, etc.  I want everyone to know that "normal" people have seizures.  Albeit our family is anything but normal in so many areas of our life...homeschooling. conservative Christian values, international adoption, adopting three heart toddlers, and the list goes on and on, but none of these unusual behaviors are in any way linked to my health.  A seizure disorder is no different than diabetes, high cholesterol or a low thyroid...inconvenient but treatable with medicines.

Recently international adoption lists are beginning to add children with seizure disorder or epilepsy to their waiting children lists.  I want people to know this is such a manageable "special need."  I want these children to come home to their forever families.  If you are considering adopting a child with a special need, consider a child with a seizure disorder aka epilepsy.

(Praise God I was seizure-free when I was in Swaziland in October.  This little girl was at one of the Care Points.  She climbed in my lap just wanting some love and cuddles.  Within 10 minutes she had fallen fast asleep.)

For me this unexpected seizure means more adjusting of my seizure meds.  It means another six months of not driving.  This is by far the most inconvenient of the side effects of my seizures. And most of all it means revisiting some of my favorite verses in Scripture,

"Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."
The Lord Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress."   Psalm 46:10,11

These are the verses the Lord showed me over 20 years ago when I began having seizures again as an adult.  He reminded me that He wants me to "be still" before Him.  I find that I get so busy "doing" His work that I forget to sit at His feet. 

Now every time I have a seizure, I immediately ask myself, "Have I been sitting still enough with my Lord?"  ...not just reading the Bible and praying but REALLY sitting still and listening for His still, small voice that speaks to me through His Word and His Spirit.  Embarrassingly, many times my answer is "no." 

That's the prize behind each seizure.  It's the gift to remind me to be still again. 

I wish I was an attentive pupil.  One of those students that learns the lesson the first time.  I'm afraid I'm one of those people that the Lord needs to hit over the head instead.  But the amazing thing about Him is He never tires of teaching me.  Again and again I bend my knee to His will and lay it all before Him, but almost accidentally I pick up a thread or two. 

My seizures are a way for Him to remind me to lay it all down again.  I'm thankful for that.

In the flesh I "hate" having the seizures.  I cry and say I just want to be "normal".  I tell my husband I don't want to do this again.  But in the still times in the evening when it's just me and the Lord, I'm so thankful that He hasn't put me on a shelf.

So in the next six months....

13 "Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it.  But one thing I do:  Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14  I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."  Phil. 3:13,14

Swaziland and Speechless

A team of 6 from New Hope Church in Pennsylvania and Michaela and I joined up in Swaziland, Africa for 12 days that changed our lives in October.



Swaziland, with the highest AIDS rate in the world and an average life expectancy of 28, is a beautiful country with a people that exude joy and life.





Our time was spent, largely, with children whose lives are impacted by the AIDS crisis...children, ages 18 mos. to 5 years, who walk up to 5 miles to CarePoints where they can get a meal for the day...many times, their only meal for the day.




Children who eagerly accept hugs and cuddles....



who need to experience the love of Christ in tangible ways....




who need those with SO much to spend time giving so little...






We've been home 3 weeks tomorrow.

I've been to Swaziland, and I'm speechless.

Now what Lord...I've seen the need, and I will be back. Show me how to share the blessings you've given me with those who are so desperately in need.

A Lesson in Trust

Phil and I had a lesson in faith for the last 72 hours.

A lesson in putting into practice what we say we believe.

A lesson in trusting the Lord when we had NO control.

Torie left on an airplane headed for Chicago on Thursday morning at 6 a.m. Her final destination, Bible College in Schladming, AUSTRIA.

And that's where the odyssey and the trusting began...

We are blessed to have a friend who allowed Torie to fly on a buddy pass to Austria. The perk of that is it is much less expensive and usually you fly business class...ahhhh....the extra space,

the down-side....you fly stand-by.

We got a call from Torie, from Chicago, on Thursday afternoon. All the flights to Munich and Frankfurt were oversold. Our original plans were to have her fly to one of those cities and take either a 4 or 8 hour train ride, respectively, to Salzburg Austria. It looked like the flights were going to be sold out through the weekend, so we decided to just have her fly back to Charlotte and begin a Plan B.

The next thing we knew, a United agent called and said they were able to get Torie on a flight to Amsterdam and she's in the air.

That' good news and bad news....

Good news...at least she'll be in Europe

Bad news....it will be a 15 hour+ train ride to Salzburg, Austria...ugh

The next phone call we got was at 4:00 a.m., oh yeah, there's a 6 hour time difference between us and Europe. Torie found the train station easily located in the airport and was planning on buying a ticket to Salzburg. She'd call us when she arrived in Salzburg. ETA - 15 1/2 hours.

Bad news...her luggage is lost...evidently it's on the way to Frankfurt.



After a day with no word, I was at our church women's breakfast and I mentioned our "little" concern. The women stopped right in the middle of everything and prayed for Torie. I LOVE the body of Christ!!

After returning home we patiently waited for the phone to ring and we waited, and we prayed, and we waited, and we prayed. Still no word.

Two days later, still no word, and I'm spending time with the Lord and I pray these verses over Torie:

"But let (Torie) who takes refuge in You be glad: let (her) ever sing for joy. Spread Your protection over (her)...." Ps. 5:11 a

I make a call to the U.S. Embassy in Amsterdam and explain the situation. I ask if we can confirm if she ever got on the train in Amsterdam, but since she paid cash there is no record.

So we wait some more...

Finally 72 hours later...we get a call...I am SO sorry but you won't believe what happened....

The story from her end unfolded....

Once Torie boarded her train for Salzburg, she shared a car with an elderly couple who spoke no English. She said at first she was guarded and just took cat naps, but finally exhaustion overtook her.

She finally put her passport "tucked upon her person" as I shall delicately put it(You Go Girl!! You got to love that girl's resourcefulness)and fell into a deep sleep. She slept SO soundly that she slept through her train change-over. Yes, that means she slept for more than 15 hours. ONLY a college-age student can do that on a strange train in another country!

When she finally woke up it was to a woman barking in her car that it was the end of the line and she had to get off. She had slept through her stop and evidently many more.

Praise God she disembarked the train just to discover their was a train leaving in 15minutes that would take her back to Salzburg. So 21+ hours later she ended up in Salzburg.

From Salzburg she bought another train ticket to Schaldming (her final destination), and 1 1/2 hours later arrived in Schladming.

Exhausted, still in her lovely black skirt and heels, she got off the train ready to hike into town (at least a 15-20 min.hike). Lo and behold, at that exact moment, Erin from Nevada (whom she had never met before) came by the train station also bound for the Bible College and they were able to ride into town together.

Erin showed her where to stay in town (the College dorms weren't open until Sunday evening) and then they scouted out a restaurant.

Praise God that Torie made it safely to Schladming, Austria and that she met another student from the Bible College from the moment she stepped off the train...

not only was it another student but a big, strapping, 6'4" take charge guy, who took Torie under his wing when she was exhausted and needed someone to come alongside her.

....I prayed..."spread Your protection over her..." and the Lord sent someone in the flesh!! I love that we serve a God who is into the details of our life!

During the wait when we didn't know where she was, the Lord kept whispering to me...do you really believe what you say you believe? She is not alone..."I am with her to the ends of the earth."

It sounds a bit melodramatic now that she is safely at the Bible College, but let me tell you...when your 20 year old daughter is "lost" in Europe for 72 hours with NO contact with you...it's not a good feeling!

Being "out of control" is not an emotion that I am comfortable with, but it was a great lesson, once again, that my trust can only be in the One who is REALLY in control! Thinking I'm ever in control is only an illusion.



And now Torie gets to "suffer" in the beauty of Schladming, Austria for the next three months stuyding God's Word...that's the life!! (Oh and by the way...she still doesn't have her luggage. She may get REALLY tired of that lovely black skirt and heels!)

Taking a Moment Off My Hamster Wheel to Celebrate Mother's Day

The last few week I've been like a hamster on an exercise wheel. I keep running faster and faster, continuously going in circles, but not really getting anywhere. When I climb in bed at night I have a "To Do" list longer than the previous day and a sinking feeling that I haven't met all of the emotional (and sometimes physical) needs of my children and husband. I keep reminding myself that the Lord can meet the needs of those around me, and I am not called to meet all their needs. But I confess these feelings of inadequacy are SO hard as a mother. And then I'm reminded, "Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10

So, today on the Lord's Sabbath and Mother's Day, I'm going to step down from my Hamster Wheel and just be still and rest. And I'm going to celebrate.

I'm going to celebrate....

Isabelle giving me Eskimo kisses through hymn singing time in church today;

I'm going to celebrate...

Sarah Mei filling my life with smiles


I'm going to celebrate...

AnnaGrace embracing her role as a big sister, selling her pony this week and trying her hand at playing the piano...



I'm going to celebrate...

Kaela's eclectic interests, fencing (Kaela's on the left), and passion for helping others including collecting clothes for our planned mission's trip to Haiti this summer...



I'm going to celebrate...

Torie's work ethic as she works almost full-time at Tractor Supply while attending college full-time. We're also celebrating God's hand of protection on her. This week she cut her hand, at work, with a box cutter and had 9 stitches. Then this weekend, while competing, she took a nasty fall off her Thoroughbred. Thankfully she was scrapped up and is sore but was not seriously hurt.












I'm going to celebrate...

that I'm married to a wonderful, godly (really good-looking) man, and he is SO patient with me!!!



And I'm going to celebrate...

that I serve the Lord who has blessed me with the desires of my heart.

"It is good to praise the Lord and Make music to your name, O Most High, to proclaim Your love in the morning and Your faithfulness at night." Ps. 92:1,2

Ouch...God stepped on my toes last night...

During the last few days the Lord has impressed upon me the importance of the following verses:

3"Endure hardship with us like a good soldier of Christ Jesus. 4 No one serving as a soldier gets involved in civilian affairs - he wants to please his commanding officer." 2 Timothy 2:3,4


My Dad in Uniform


Growing up in a military family - my father served in both the Marines and the Air Force - my husband graduated from The Citadel and my little sister has served both active duty in the Air Force and is still a reservist - I understand what military service means. I admire the wholehearted devotion and self-discipline it requires, the denial of self and the attention to the "master" while denying civilian interests.


Using that analogy, the Lord has been whispering to me recently - "are you involved in any civilian affairs?" You know...the things that "moth and rust will destroy..." After all...the Lord is my commanding officer.


19"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matt. 6:19-21


Despite the Lord's prompting, I had been fairly successfully in squelching the Holy Spirit's still small voice...you know what I mean...


"but Lord, I know I could give the money that I made from the garage sale and the items I sold on E-Bay to help a child, but I really "need" some flowers for my front porch and I "need" to reupholster my dining room chair. After all we have adopted twice in three years and have had three open-heart surgeries in that same amount of time. I think that's enough for right now don't you?" (I'm not proud of this...just being honest.)


But in God's tender mercy He continued to pursue me. He used a post from Kisses from Katie to get my attention again. She is a young American woman in her twenties who has given it ALL up to live in Africa and show the love of Christ. This is what she writes:


"The projects Amazima has started in this community, are wonderful, but only meet the needs of some of the people, only scratching the surface of the problems. God assures me this is OK. If I continue to preach the Gospel and more importantly LIVE the Gospel in this community, though the outward conditions of the people may never change or may change very slowly, but if these people can come with us to Heaven, a few years of suffering will pale in comparison. In the mean time, He allows me to see Him in their faces and to love Him in bandaging their wounds and letting their charcoal and mud covered children curl up in my lap."


(If you've never read this blog...it's a MUST read. This is one wise young woman with an incredible heart for the Lord's work!!)


Then the Holy Spirit got my attention with a blog post from A Place Called Simplicity (another one of my favorite blogs). Her post is called I Didn't Get The Memo which talks about not getting the memo that says we have the right to do what we want to, to decorate our house, have our botox, play our golf or tennis games, pursue our hobbies, retire with our 401K, while those around us are suffering. Funny...I didn't get that memo either...hmmm...


Then I sat down and read Tom Davis's book, Red Letters, Living A Faith That Bleeds. "Okay, okay, Lord. I'm ready to bend a knee. I'm ready to let you be my commander...once again."


I "happened" upon a picture of a little girl, on Tom Davis organization's website - Children's HopeChest, who lives in Swaziland (if you're like me, and I'm embarrassed to admit this, but I had to run to my world map on the wall to find out where Swaziland is. Just an FYI - it's a country located in NorthEast South Africa.)

Thabile is 4ish (birthdays aren't a big deal in Swaziland where only 1 in 10 children will live to be 32) and is in need of a sponsor to make sure she has food in her belly, basic medical care, someone to hug her and tell her that Jesus loves her. So with the money I had in my "garage sale" envelope, I'm going to help little Thabile.

If you come to my house you'll see empty spaces where I usually have flowers...


And my chairs might have a few cracks in them...

But when you look at the windowsill over my kitchen sink you'll see the sweetest face looking back at you...

And in the words of Katie...if she can come to Heaven with me (through having a full belly and some one's loving touch and words that tell her about her Savior, Jesus), it will all be worth it!!